change | from the archives

"from the archives" is a series sharing journal entries from my blog "beautiefullthings." if you've already read this, you'll notice I've added a few words. hindsight is 2020 - and I wish I could go back and tell the girl who wrote all her feelings out because she wanted to believe things would get better - that spring was coming.

It happens when the clocks turn ahead. When the days get a little warmer & a little longer. When what was once dead starts to wake up and peak through the parts of winter that it's ready to forget. And I can’t help but think that spring shows us a little bit of what God can do with us.

Winter can feel long - darkness and dull skies. Sometimes we don’t even have the hope for ourselves of a brighter day. But that’s okay, because He still has it for us. He can teach it to us as He wakes us up to His grace each day.

As our hearts break through the dead parts of winter, they begin to grow. He begins to show us that a season is only temporary, after all. He begins to show us that patience wears off, and gently remind us there was never a reason to doubt. And He reminds us again that we only grow if we look to Him.

He isn’t done with our story even if the last season wasn’t one we’re proud of. He isn’t giving up on us because we’re taking too long. He isn't walking away because we're struggling. He’s bringing in a new season into our lives where we can come alive in Him and realize that we do have a purpose. A new season where we learn that no one will step into our purpose for us. And we can’t go back but we can go forward into something different – something new.

Sometimes change is something we run from. & then other times? We even get to the point where we are running towards it with open arms, ready to leave yesterday behind. It is time we begin running.

I think this happened quite a few times for people in the Bible. People who wanted to run from who they were yesterday. People like David and Jonah and Saul.

God was strong enough to bring them into a new season, and He’s strong enough to do it with us, too.

His hope for us is powerful enough to drive out the weight of guilt & shame we might carry. Or the darkness from winter.

& it might take a little time, but that doesn’t mean He isn’t redeeming the worst parts of us.

We may not be able to get what we wish we could back. Or give it back. But He is pouring something new into us to give. & we can carry that into spring. Change might just be the best thing.